I Creep People Out

I’m a team of one at my office, so I barely have interaction with my coworkers.  I try, but the culture isn’t great here.  Anyway, I was going to work from home one day and I thought I should probably tell someone so they didn’t worry.   I told the dude next me,

“Hey, I’m just going to work from home tomorrow.  Just wanted to let you know so you don’t think I’m dead or something.”

Would have been fine if I had stopped there, but I didn’t…

“Yeah, you know I got to thinking I would be like the perfect murder victim.  My work doesn’t directly impact you guys so you probably wouldn’t notice if I was gone for awhile.  I live alone, I don’t have friends here in town.  There’s no one I see or talk to on a regular basis.  It could be weeks before anyone came to check my apartment.  By that time my dog and cat would have probably eaten half my body.”

He stared at me wide eyed and responded, “so… You’re not going to be here tomorrow…?”

This.  This is why I don’t have friends.

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